"Stress Relief for Busy People"

Attention Small Business Owners

The Greatest Business Secret in the World:
5 Things You Must Know For Success

By Lisa Rickwood, "The Escape Artist."

It doesn’t matter whether you sell ice to Eskimos, sweep the steps of a stadium, pick asparagus, sell clothing, computer equipment or work at home, sooner or later you’ll have to deal with people and when you know these five key secrets, you’ll rise above any challenge.

What’s the secret? The secret is this: you’ll get what you want in business when you learn how to effectively deal with people – all kinds of people. It’s not the 'stuff' in life that should be your biggest focus - it’s the connections and relationships with others. The most successful individuals in the world know they only reap riches when they effectively interact with others.

You can be a skilled artist, a gifted athlete, a talented musician but if you’re too shy to perform in public or if you’re obnoxious or rude, no one will support you and you’ll fail. No amount of talent or skill will matter if you can’t form positive relationships with others.

If you’re shy or dealing with people is a major stressor for you, or if you dream of crawling into a cave and disappearing, you need to know these five key secrets now.

Here are the five greatest secrets:

1. PAY ATTENTION: This is one of the most obvious, simple and important secrets. When you deal with others, pay attention to them. Listen to their words, study their body language – really try to understand their issues.

This sounds easy but most of us don’t pay attention; while someone’s talking we’re tuned into our needs, thinking about getting home, paying a bill, feeling hungry or noticing how big the speaker’s nose is. Because we’re focused on ourselves, we’re distracted and disconnected and misinterpret words, make wrong assumptions, or completely miss the message.

In the television game show, Jeopardy, the million dollar winner, Ken Jennings, said his father told him that he would ‘appear more intelligent by simply paying attention.’

Next time you’re dealing with someone, block all thoughts in your mind and focus on the person who’s talking to you. Study the way they hold their arms, how they gaze at you, their tone and what they’re saying. You’ll be amazed at what you’ll learn instead of thinking about what great thing you’ll say next.

2. GIVE RESPECT: It doesn’t matter where you live or what you do for a living, everyone craves respect. Whether a person is the CEO of a large corporation or the member of a street gang, respect is crucial in forming strong relationships with others. People want to feel important, cared for and needed.

In business, people only do business with people they know, like and trust (and respect). When you treat others with respect, people reciprocate it back to you.

My husband and I own a high-end retail menswear store and it doesn’t matter who walks through our door or how they’re dressed, they get respect. What has this done for our business? It’s made us win ‘The Best of the City’ competitions six years in a row as voted by the people in our city.

Best of all, we’ve made many friends from all walks of life – CEOs of large corporations, actors, families of famous singers, people who’ve been outfitted to meet Prince Charles, you name it.

3. HAVE PATIENCE: This is one of the most difficult secrets when dealing with people but also crucial in building relationships. With our sped up lifestyles, we often don’t take the time to be patient with others.

Think about your daily commute on a highway. Did you cut someone off in traffic because you didn’t want to wait for them to get out of your way? How about people who are buying something and take too long in a lineup? Does your blood boil?

I admit that patience is one virtue I struggle with but here’s what I’ve found out: When you’re patient with people, they respect you and are willing to go out of their way for you.

People have complex lives and sometimes terrible things happen to them right before they get on the highway or stand in that lineup. Maybe they lost a parent, they had a horrible fight with their partner, maybe they’re about to lose a home in a foreclosure – everyone has something that can distract them.

The first year my husband and I owned our high-end menswear store, we hired a wonderful older gentleman to help us. On his fourth day of work, he collapsed and had a fatal heart attack in our store. A few hours later, a police officer informed us he passed away; I couldn’t stop thinking about this when I drove home later that day.

On the way home, I was so ‘out of it' I drove to a left turning lane when I meant to go straight through an intersection. I messed up the traffic lights and people behind me had to sit through a whole set of lights. I expected everyone to honk at me but for some unknown reason, the people in the five cars behind me sat patiently and no one was rude or obnoxious. It was a relief because I’m pretty sure I would’ve been less than pleasant if they reacted as my nerves were frayed.

4. BE HONEST: People know when someone is ‘lying or pulling the wool over their eyes.’ As a result, they won’t do business with you or form any meaningful relationship.

I spend a lot of time in my retail clothing store and know it’s crucial to be honest when dealing with my clients. If I tell a gentleman a suit fits well and it doesn’t, he’ll know I was dishonest to achieve a sale and guess what, I’ll never see him again.

I’d rather be honest and lose a sale because that customer will remember I had integrity and deal with me in the future. I’ve experienced this so many times, it would make your head spin.

5. BE DEPENDABLE: ‘A person is only as good as his word.’ My mother used to say this to me all the time and it never had impact until I grew up and had a job.

In a world filled with false promises and dishonesty, a dependable, reliable person is worth their weight in gold.

If you say you’re going to do something, do it and if you can’t deliver, find a way to eventually fulfill your pledge. People will be more understanding if you offer a suggestion of when you will complete a project if you’re delayed.

In the show, The Apprentice, Donald Trump’s pet peeve is when people don’t follow through on what they say they’ll accomplish. This bothers him because he’d never have the success he has if he and his team weren’t reliable.

Whether your company is small or large, dependability is crucial. You want to know your employees will do what they say or that you’ll deliver what you promise. This is the only way business moves ahead and is successful and it all points back to relationships with people.

One of the most challenging aspects of living is dealing with others but once you know the five key rules, you’ll form strong, caring relationships and your business will be successful. In the end, it’s not about the business, it’s about the people.

© 2006 Lisa Rickwood. All rights reserved.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Lisa Rickwood, "Small Biz Stress Buster," is a small business coach, visual artist and author of Escape The Pace: 100 Fun And Easy Ways To Slow Down And Enjoy Your Life and co-author of Power & Soul: 42 Successful Entrepreneurs Share their Secrets for Creating the Business and Life of Their Dreams. She helps small business owners ‘master stress for professional and personal success.’ Get your FREE e-book, 5 Critical Actions That Hurt Your Business and Add Stress to Your Life…and How to Escape Them by visiting: http://www.escapethepace.com

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I look forward to being of service,

“Small Business Stress Buster”